| omg |
[ March 13th, 2007 | 2:18pm ] |
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I feel like such an ass. Like I've been very MLA? is that the word? From my friends. Like, the other day I ran into Kyle, someone I used to talk ot a ton online and hes like, "....Heyy dont know if you remmember me..It's Kyle from Myspace" >> I felt bad. I havent talked to him in a long time. You know, ever since that thing happened with Daniel, I've been by his side. It's kind of sad.. I mean, he needed me because of his condition, but I am almost too dependent on him, and it hurt our relationship for a while. We're getting it all back though so its okay. I love Daniel soo much though, he's so, real, like I know that sounds dumb but there isnt a lot of "real" and honest people. I htink sometimes Daniel gets pissed that I dated Trebor before, but he has nothing to worry about. Trebor was always trying to prove himself to people and thought an ego "made the man", hes so fake, and sometimes for whatever reason I bring him up, and sometimes its around Daniel but its not cuz I care about him, its just like whatever. After I realized he only emailed me to shoot the shit really when Jenn was out of town, I lost interest in any kind of contact with him, or even having some kind of memory of him ,lol. I've made an effort to spend more time at home, my Dad is pissed at me though. He called me pathetic, because my printer doesnt work. Whateeever. He had to get a hard copy of some insurance form for me instead, w/e. I dont even use my computer that much anymore. It's strange. Anyways, somehow, I dont know the fuck about whats happening to anyone around me. Like, hellooo Pipers in fuckin jail. Poor girl she has to be nice to everyone, and she got screwed. Ugh, I'm fucking ticked. Theres so much drama, like, with one of my best friends lil sis getting pregnant..etc..wel im in class. tt this thing later.
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| scared shitless |
[ January 4th, 2007 | 12:23pm ] |
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Well, first entry of the year! I dont really like LJ as much as I "dug?" xanga but w/e. It works as a bloggy thing and it makes Cordelia happy :P. Anyways, the last few days, have been strange. I'm running off of like, 15 hrs of sleep. lol. From now from like, Dec 30. Dec. 30 parents had a parrtay &everyone left at like 1:30, I had to drive Marion home, I fell asleep on the couch till 3, then woke up again around 10am, then it was Moms bday. Later that night, I went to Sarahs new years eve party, and got kind of almost drunk, I didnt feel drunk but I had a hangover, and I didnt sleep much that or the next night. I was nervous about not signing up for DVC yet, and also thought I had work at 2, well, I didnt..It was my day off...>< I spent an hr at work when I didnt have to! =( Then the night after that, I had to get up for work at 5am... Then, I spent the day trying desperately to find something for Daniels bday.. lol. THEN, Daniel and I eventually met up.. &&& when he went to drop me off, we didnt know what to do, so we did the usual, just sit in my driveway till curfew, when he starts spacing out and getting really hot then sort of looks like hes falling asleep,its not till I'm trying to get him to sit up and hes falling forward that I realize anythings wrong. He was completely out of it, I couldnt get him "in it" and I got my parents, and my dad was putting cold water on him, and I was like going through all his pockets looking for his cell so I could call his Mom (she wasnt picking up the only number I have on my phone) I even was like buzzing him with the cell phone vibrator, normally he comes out of "sleeping" with that. [Cuz yeah its a creepy feeling:P] Anyways, he wouldnt "rouse" so we called an ambulance. He was out for like an hour, and finally woke up when the "trainee" missed the vein for the IV, heheheh. I was SO scared though. Like, they took him away on a stretcher and he was all passed out. I was like screaming and crying and flipping out, it was awful then the paramedics were like ** they kept asking me if he was on "recreational drugs&alcohol" like they thought I was lying when I said no.. It was annoying because they were wasting time IMO asking their stupid shit over and over again. ALSO I'm like totally flipping, do I really look like someone whose going to jeopardize his life over something stupid? I love him.. I dont understand HOW people could think that way and NOT care about someone they love even if they did have it drug related. Like honestly, at that point, who gives a shit, if he did, I would just want him safe again. Auuugh. And I cant sleep anymore because, instead of just being exhausted and falling asleep because "oh hes okay now", I cant sleep and I'm really scared its going to happen again, and I WONT be there or something to help him. What if hes driving next time or something? I dont know, I think I'm kind of traumatized by the whole situation or something :[. Nothings supposed to happen to him though =( We're going to ....get married, and..live on a farm near the beach..and.. =( [have a "llama farm" lol you dork] UGH. >< it fuckin scares me. Who else is going to teach me bass? Or make funny faces and sounds at me when we're supposed to be going to sleep.. :P Or purposely act like he knows more about a subject than me just to see me get riled ? Or point out the name.make.and model of EVERY semi unique car on the roadway..
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| Yee!!! |
[ December 17th, 2006 | 10:28pm ] |
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mood |
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 ecstatic |
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music |
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"Line Up"-Aerosmith |
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Omg so Daniel and I put our foreheads together again- we did this Prom night and this was when we got so close...and and.. ahhh.. omg it was special! Maybe we're the only nuts that get really connected that way.. but but ahhh I loved it =)
I love him >_>
OMGGGGG today we were holding hands and I was like, "Ouch that ring.. OH its that one.." Our marraige ring from middle school.. lol.and hes like, "Someday maybe you'll find yours, I can help, or just get you a replacement one."
ahhhhh!!!!!!!
=)
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| Grr |
[ November 28th, 2006 | 12:47am ] |
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mood |
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whoa! |
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music |
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>_> |
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Okay, so I should have gone to the band practice today..Daniel and his brother got in a massive fight. His brother grabbed him by like the neck and slammed him against the wall. If I had seen that, I would have probably done something to Steven, or at least said something. Now Daniel was like "I'm thinking about leaving that band" and someone already put up a bulletin about how they need a new bassist, its fucking stupid. That band was alot to Daniel, and his brother instead of getting over himself, had to be an ass. Playing bass makes Daniel extremely happy. >< Gahhh. I've seen his brother at those things. He's like really abrasive and nit picky. It frys my ass. That band is NOTHING with just him. >< Gaaaah!!! Oh well.. Tonight was interesting, I've never seen Daniel cry before. I mean, I didnt want to lol but yeah. He cried for a long time.. Sweety =( I'm lucky I hit almost all green going up there. I kind of sped. Heh. Whaaatevver, my man needed me! lol. I know now that I need to keep nappies in my car. You know like napkins, not like diapers. LOL, Daniel kissed my stomach tonight and was like "I'm just saying goodnight" haha. Warped angel<3. I cant believe we joke like that. Wtf is wrong with us. Its so wrong, yet so right at the same time. There is no one more perfect than Daniel to (someday!) start a family with. People are starting to start that bs about "Oh yeah it wont work out *pat pat* its cute for now" kind of bullcrap. I listened to it a bit before with Trebor but I learned my lesson. (Plus, Daniel and I just "work" better than Treb and I did which helps me not give a shit even better!:):P) BUT YEAH haha. Gmails down again. Shit. Fuck. lol. Anyways. I need to find my checkbook. I owe the 'parentals & my beau man money. I was going to give Daniel a bit extra too, cuz he does alot for me, and...well xmas is kind of coming up, and he really wants this bass. I really want him to have that bass too. Whether or not that...dont make me go there right now lets him play or not, Daniel is really talented and, that bass is easier for him to play with his wrist problems and stuff it seems and he gets sooo happy its soooo cute =). He was dancing, getting down with his.. k, Not going to be a dork :D heeeeh!!! My back hurts. I have like a boring art class and shit tommorow so I guess I should get going.. :) Have to pop the retainer in hehe! Going to...
-loose the f-ing weight and go back to my goal, which was to be completely (not bellpepper)toned
-blonde! like HELLOO I was, I like to just be a fucking hair color that.. people can agree on:P yeah k, your weird too :)
-not beeee so f-ing (JUST SAY FUCKING GODDAMMIT! HAHAHAHA) lazy, and wear my retainersssss, sunscreen, organize, start up (CC!!!), practice that damn ass violin (at least I have lessons now.. I did like playing it:)) not talk shit about Trebor when I hears that he did the same about me because you know inside I actually dont care, annnd like go to class. haha. and work. like clockwork!!!! And get daniel to not waste money on ..za bell. When we live together, we'll have like "a bell fund" next to mom and i's "secret sacred bucky fund" for starbucks soooo he can save up aaaaaannnd go to school! yayyy! :) I fucking hate how he doesnt even have the option right now, you know? Maybe that dumbass business he works for can start paying him for his worth too. (No thats not biased!:P)HAHA. and Will was funny today. "Daniel..I'm surprised hes not picketing out front ...'all we are saaaying is give chelsea a tennn'"lmfao I laughed so hard. That was so cute when Daniel took Will, my supervisor on about lunch breaks during 6 hr. shifts. Daniels hot ;) hehe.
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| Holy Fuck |
[ November 27th, 2006 | 6:20am ] |
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mood |
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 tired |
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music |
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I have that jackass john legendwhototallyblows stuckinyead |
] |
My first day waking up for my 6 am shift. Would be a fuckload better if Dad wasnt taking A SHOWER right now =( I tripped and fell on Daniels xmas gift too.. I hope its okay >_>
EDIT:
Heheh, I got this magnet the other day...Its this like pinup style driving, says, 'Ran into my ex, put it in reverse and hit him again' Hehehe. Yeah yeah, I'm a bitch. More on that later ;) :-*
Cordelia! Foxaaay lady, I think i love ya ;)
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| Goddamn |
[ November 26th, 2006 | 12:34am ] |
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mood |
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exhausted |
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music |
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nahn |
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I love Daniel soooo much. I can't begin to even say what its like to actually connect with a boyfriend... ><
I'm frickin lucky duude! =) He feels how I do too, for keeping it in the longterm.. Yessss!!! Like he teases me about how I cant design the bands site cuz I'm not engaged to a band member like this other girl, but he's said he wants to get married to me and stuff someday, and it seems not too far off either somehow, and have kids and..!! yeee..
Yeah, He makes me want to have kids too..
W-t-ffff is up with me?!? What does this boy dooooo too meee?!?! lol ><
Not much else is up really. Changing the work scedule! Sooo excited. My friends probbaly think I've been soddin off on them on purpse, like Bec, Ryan, Brad and Sarah.. I'm not =( I've just been exhausted and not exactly busy (I sit on my ass in a call center 5 hrs a day) but its not you know time permitting to lke, chill and shit.
Going to go for that Customer Service position again.. If I work there long enough, maybe eventually I could get into the graphic design dept. Need to eventually find a job with benefits.. Unless Beau and I get married and he gets spousal ones :P haha. =) JK!! [thats def. not the reason I want to be like that with him, but you know.. maybe if I sound practical..! haha jk;))
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| Wow, random day change.. |
[ September 22nd, 2006 | 10:55pm ] |
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mood |
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 sad |
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music |
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"Snow"-Red Hot Chili Peppers |
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Well, it was going okay. Super busy at work! And kind of blah before that. When Mom picked me up though, everything changed.. My car is going to need like, ANOTHER 2,265$ in repairs, still no social life, found out Brandens in jail, and Cheryls mom is super sick like in a nursing home sick going to die, I feel bad for Cheryl, my aunts in serious pain and had to go to the doctors, right after she had her surgery, my ears fucked up, Ugh. I LOVE this song though. It reminds me of my aunt but also Gilles, and Becca. I miss them.. >_> I miss alot of things lately.. Oh well, i still have some of those things that are irreplaceable right? Friends, license, more allownace in doing stuff like going to the major cities with my daniel<3, and stuff..>_> I dunno.. Someday it'll be less "blah" right? :(. Eugh....... I'm really depressed. I feel bad about Ashley and Michael too. That stupid prick pulled a 'Trebor' on her. >_> Makes me feel really bad for her.
edit:
marianna: haha
marianna: f as in
marianna: sam
me: lmao
me: you saw that? hahaha
me: Yeah seriously! I said that
me: and at the end
me: THe guys like
me: Thats WAY too high
me: You said F like Frank
me: lmao
me: >_>
me: hahaha
marianna: yeah i got your void slip
marianna: haha
me: hahaha
me: Yeah. That guy, voided the order
me: so he could have the row in front of it
me: LOL
me: i'm like
me: whatever...
me: lol
marianna: haha
me: Haha, yeah I was sort of feeling annoyed when I did that slip hehehehe
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| Dude, Myspace craps. lol. |
[ September 17th, 2006 | 9:10am ] |
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mood |
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 &amused lol |
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music |
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"I Am" Ricky Martin |
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I had a band Ricky Martin thing going on so I could have a RM song on my page.. They deleted the song and made it into a NORMAL myspace, not a band one. Its still on my page even though its not there though, LOL. its wierd. I dont understand >_>
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| Haha damn the last year.. crazy |
[ September 17th, 2006 | 8:50am ] |
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mood |
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ecstatic |
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music |
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"Stomp" The Brothers Johson |
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So the last year. Like, a lil over a month ago, I lost ALL that weight, to find my confidence or w/e, was single, planning out CC with Cordelia, HANGING OUT WITH GORDON IN SCOOTLAND!!! :) Oh, and then everything with Trebor. >_> But yeah, I started to be truly happy & independent and everything, hopeful, inspired, WHATEVER, shit I'd never felt before. And like.. then my grandmother died. And my aunt got breast cancer. And I found out a TON about Kyle. How fucking, not cool, lol. Then, I dunno. It hit me we were graduating!! AHH! haha. How cool was that. Acalanes sucked. Then Trebor started screwing me up again, lol. How, fun.. But I dont know how it happened, I think Daniel came online once and for some reason IMed me and we talked like the whole night &..Decided to hang out somehow..And yeah, we did. And then we just started talking on the phone ALL THE TIME and online, every night. Then *cough* Trebor refused to take me to another major thing like Senior Ball and out of NO WHERE, daniel offered. It really touched me. I mean, that shits expensive and this is the guy who avoided dances FOREVER. I was really impressed he'd do that for his friends, you know? AHH he's so fuckin amazing. Anyways. Then, we started hanging out alot more because of that dance. We had to get his mom to sign a guest pass, then we had a ton of time to kill so we started seeing retarded movies together and then we had to get his tux.. LOL, dude its been 4 months and that boys helped me pick out perfume for my MOTHER, lmao, helped me bake for my grad thing, spent whole nights with me, gone out to dinner with me, picked me up from work, taken me to school, met me on lunch, taken me out for school supplies, to the bank, to berkely, and san francisco till way late haha, slept on my couch at 4 in the morning, sat with me in taco bell parking lots for hours lol, and in the park, and so much more, he's become my best friend in hardly any time at all. Like seriously, I have NOT felt this before. I can share ANYTHING with Daniel, I dont feel insecure or anything, theres so much chemistry and everything. I trust him too, and can just be my self around him. We're always on the same wavelength too. I'm always so happy with him. Everything we share together, makes me fall in love with him even more. Usually I'm kind of shy, but right from the start I clicked with him, lol maybe its because he's seen me be such a total douche when we were younger LMAO. Ahh.........>_> I love him so much. I can't WAIT till we live together. I dont think he believes it all the time. Because I want to wait for a lil while... But yeah. aww, I do want to live with him, very much. I just dont want us to run out of money, and have to stop doing it. That would blow. LOl, really. bad.
OH SHIT, and yeha. I got my LICENSE. LOL. Yeah!!! I'm ungrounded and shit. Still need to find a car though.. haha. Cant wait! I think I'm going to dye my hair when my parents are out of town too hehehe. And yeah, its all going to be a blast. SHIT, so awesome! Haha. I can't wait till I get my license!! Too bad my ugly ass lil kid permit pics going to be on there for the next 10 yrs.. LOL. fucking DMV records haha. I think soomeone needs a power surge>_> hehe.
CORDELIA!! I love you! LETS GET THE CRAP BACK ON CC hehehe :) :_*
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[ August 18th, 2006 | 9:18am ] |
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mood |
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 sick |
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music |
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Coldplay- "Beautiful World" |
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Well, I guess its about time anyways. I havent been able to talk about myself for a while now..Hehehe. I used to have a xanga but then I got rid of it because it just didnt fit me anymore. No, no, no more fat, apathetic, Trebor obsessed, jobless, dependent on others, going nowhere Chels! lol. Out of high school, new job, new school, new boy, etc. Soon, new home once Daniel and I move out. So yeah! Uh huh uh huh. >_> Yeah, so anyways. It'll be amazing. Did I tell you for the last time in 5 years I was happy last summer? Pretty cool....LOL But then grandma died, aunt got breast cancer, Trebor pissed me off again, everything got shot to shit. But yeah. Oh well.. Moving along. I still have the confidence thank god. It's soo much easier being in a relationship when you ARE confident. LOL, life is so wierd though. Daniel? I NEVER talked to that guy when we went to middle school, he was just sort of "there." And, he's like, one of my best friends. He used to be soo unaproachable. I feel VERY comfortable with him though. I dont know, hmm. I dont know. I feel kind of depressed lately, its not him, hes wonderful. But like, its my father, my health, working all the time, Steffens death, etc etc. Shit! Have to go to school, will elaborate later hehe.
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